A story from a few years ago …
Delaney was five and Ashlyn was three. They ran around the house jumping, skipping, singing and dancing like most little girls. Ashlyn never had much chance to play what she wanted because Delaney was insistent on making Ashlyn play her way. OK, I’ll say it, Delaney was bossy!
One day Shirley and I were outside doing something in the yard to make it appear we did yard work more than once a year. Neither one of us has a green thumb or a brown one or even a black one. I went inside to cook something for the girls to munch on - popcorn.
After pressing start on the microwave I returned to the yard. Five minutes turned to ten and ten quickly became twenty. You know how easy it is to lose track of time when doing something you love. Do you know how long you should cook microwave popcorn?
Delaney came running outside skipping in circles asking for her popcorn over and over and over. She was using that annoying high-pitched voice your children sometimes use. Shirley went in to get the snack and that’s when it happened ….. She started screaming in that same voice. I ran inside and found the kitchen full of dark black smoke. Scanning the room with eagle eye precision I noticed the source – the microwave. Black puffs billowed from the heatmaker.
With the black cloud growing, smoke filled the dining room and den. With the smoke alarm blaring, Shirley screaming and smoke covering the kitchen I sprang into action. I reached into a drawer and grabbed an oven mitt. Reaching into the microwave I felt a pile of soot – hard, dry soot that used to be popcorn. The noise was deafening – smoke alarm, screaming wife and now Delaney skipping around the island waving her arms shouting “Stop, Drop and Roll, Stop, Drop and Roll.” Apparently, she had just had a fireman come visit her kindergarten class. She knew exactly what to do. I have to admit at this point it did become comical.
Ashlyn came running into the kitchen because she thought we were having a party without her. Standing at the kitchen door with her usual I’ve-been-up-to-something-you-don’t-know-about smile, Delaney looked at her and said, “Ash, stop, drop and roll.” She grabbed Ashlyn and made her lay on the floor. We lost it when she started rolling Ashlyn toward the front door saying, “Stop, drop and roll. I’m saving your life, I’m saving your life,” over and over.
Needless to say, if you ever cook popcorn in the microwave make sure you select 2:30, not 230:00. Apparently, pushing too many zeros is not a good thing.
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