It started the same as everyday following a great fall. I woke up with my eyes crossed, my head tilting and the room spinning. Followed by inspection after inspection after inspection. On my fifth and last house, I saw them - dark, sinister and ominous. I cautiously slid my ladder from my truck never taking my eyes from theirs. The stare down had begun – man against beast.
I was scared … Tutor style. With large, fangs showing, they growled, snarled and barked. I growled, snarled and barked back. They slowly turned and walked away. Stupid dogs, I thought.
With precision and confidence, I continued to the house. After inspecting the right slope of the roof, I stepped over the ridge to the left. And that’s when it happened …. The dark, demonic spirits taking up residence inside the pit bull hissed with vengeance. Using my long range super hero abilities, I starred them down again. This time, they won … they circled the house, growling, snarling and barking. You’d think all the noise would have aroused the suspicion of someone nearby – not in this neighborhood.
There I was sitting on the roof, baking in 100 degree heat, wondering how to escape. What goes up must come down. As you know, coming down isn’t my specialty. I sat still in a valley for a few minutes until the hounds lost interest.
Since Delaney was sitting in the truck, I got her attention.
“When you see my ladder come down, open my door.”
“Why?”
“Cuz I’m gonna get chased.”
“Really!”
I was a little surprised by her sudden interest in my predicament. Then I remembered I kinda like watching people in situations like this. I think she was interested cuz she needed to laugh.
I slowly, quietly slid down the ladder and lowered it. I crept toward my truck. When I was about half way across the yard, they saw me. Man, them dogs can run!
I threw my ladder in the back of the truck, Delaney flung my door open and once I slammed it …. They were at the front of the truck ready to attack.
Oh well, just another adventure.
